Chapter Five

I headed for the Forest of Magic.

Without Marisa to guide me, I couldn’t know where exactly her house was. Hopefully the woodland trails were still visible, and I could follow them to some hermit magician’s house. Otherwise I’d have to spend another night outdoors. The thought of it made me grimace.

Time and again, I swept my gaze around the valley, looking for two human girls struggling through the snow as I was. There was no one to be seen. Everything felt frozen and sterile around me, as if I was the last living creature in a frozen country. Daylight faded fast.

Despite the weariness hanging on me, I plodded toward the line of trees, and I hoped I’d meet Reimu again by tomorrow at the latest. I needed to see the look on her face when I told her about my conversation with the winter elemental.

“That’s right,” I said, thinking out loud. “I solved your problem with the ice fairy.”

Of course, I hadn’t solved anything yet. I had no idea how or if I could return an entire missing season. Just the thought of vindication against Reimu warmed my insides. Even imagining the moral victory was enough to keep me going.

With these thoughts tumbling through my mind, I almost missed the footprints in the snow. I did a double-take, then stopped and stared down.

“Whose are these?”

It couldn’t have been Reimu or Marisa. The tracks were small, as if a child had gone walking by recently. No human kids would be out here, so it must be a youkai trail. The footprints ran at an angle to mine, almost perpendicular. They still led off in the direction of the Forest, but far from where I would have otherwise entered.

I looked up and tried to judge the distance. It would be past dark by the time I reached the Forest, no matter which angle I took.

Thinking through my options: I could ignore these footprints, or I could follow them. They might lead to a hot meal and a warm bed, or they might lead to a monster who would eat my face. I can defend myself against most threats – but after two nights of sleeping poorly and slogging through miles of snow, I wasn’t at my sharpest.

I took in a chestful of cold air, let it out. My breath appeared in a small cloud.

“Better to hunt than be hunted.”

Even though Reimu wasn’t here, I regretted saying that out loud. She would make some snide remark about my history.

I followed the footprints.

---

Daylight was long gone when I reached the line of trees. I had ignited another spellcard to light my path, but the spell’s color wasn’t well suited for following footprints in snow. I kept looking down to follow the tracks, then glancing up to keep from bumping head-first into a tree. Glance up, glance down, up, down, over and over. My progress was slow.

After a long time marching, it startled me to feel a quick puff of air. There had been no wind for hours, and this felt as if something fast had just flown past me. I stopped, stood still, looking all around myself.

My spell light didn’t reach far into the woods. Shadows of bushes and tree trunks joined together in the dead blackness of winter night. I could see no more than fifteen feet in any direction.

Too late did I realize that my spell light would act as a beacon, giving my position away to any hungry beast that lurked these woods. I considered extinguishing the spell, but that would leave me blind. I had to protect myself some way other than stealth.

Another puff of air pulled at my cloak. Something had just darted behind me, crossing the trail of footprints I left. I spun around, and barely saw some fluttering fabric escape the circle of light. It had looked like the hem of a dress skirt.

“You’d better just talk to me,” I said out loud, “assuming you can. You’re fast, but speed doesn’t matter to me.”

The hollow airspace of the woods swallowed my voice.

Based on the timing of the last two near-misses, I guessed when this creature was going to fly past me again. It would probably have circled around to zip behind me, trying to send me into a panic.

I shifted.

At first, nothing seemed to change from my perspective. The woods were still dark, cold, dead in all directions.

When I turned around, I saw her hanging in air.

The girl was frozen in a horizontal dive past me, as if she had run up to a great speed then leaped head-first to pounce on some prey. She looked young, but tall and skinny for her age, not even counting the feline ears that stuck up from her hair. Her left ear was pierced with a golden ring. At first, I thought those two ropy tail things were an accessory of her dress, but no – they were actual tails, which came out the back of her red skirt. Her blouse had long sleeves, but she wore no trousers or leg-warmers. She wasn’t clothed for this weather, but that doesn’t matter for all youkai. Some species don’t mind extreme temperatures.

After spending a few seconds to take in her appearance, I walked closer.

“Must be your footprints I was following,” I said to the time-stopped youkai girl.

I held up my right arm, not close to her, but directly in her flight path.

I let my shift go. Time resumed. She flew face-first into my arm, like a horseback rider who runs too close to low-hanging branches and takes a bough upside the head.

My arm was ready to move so that the impact didn’t hurt me much, but it was more than enough to knock her off balance. She tumbled to the ground, sending up a spray of snow and woodland debris. My light caught the cloud of icy pinpoints with a dazzling array of sparkles.

The girl slammed into a bush, which absorbed her momentum. She kicked and thrashed to free herself, managed to stand for a second, then slipped on an icy patch and fell to her side again.

“Gah!” she cried. “Ouch!”

Her hat had flown off in the commotion. After no time had passed, I stood over her with her hat in hand, holding it down to her.

“So you can talk,” I said.

She jumped in surprise, seeing me appear beside her instantly. She rolled onto her butt and kicked herself backward, trying to put any space between us.

“Stop!” she said. “Look, I’m sorry! It’s hard to smell things in the cold. I couldn’t tell what you were.”

I stepped forward, again holding her hat out to her. “Here.”

She got to her feet, and didn’t bother brushing any of the dirt or snow off her dress. She took the hat and set it between her ears. Now that she was wearing it, I could tell it was a green mob cap.

“Now what are you?” I said. “And why were you stalking me?”

“I’m a Chen, is what I am. I thought you were following me to get at my village. What’s your name, lady?”

“Sakuya. I’ve never heard of a chen before.”

“I’ve never heard of a Sakuya before, so we’re even. Are you here for my village?”

“I don’t... no. I’m just trying to find a warm place to rest until dawn.”

Chen’s face lit up. “Oh, sure! You should come with me then. I’m looking for new members. You can spend the night, and decide if you like the place.”

“I’m actually looking for a specific house. There’s two girls who—”

Chen held up both hands, as if trying to dissuade me from making a mistake.

“Oh, no. Don’t go to the Forest magicians. They’ve been trying to kick us out since before my Ran got the village’s bones built up. We’ll be safe there, though. We’ve got traps and a soft ward that tells all the mages to keep out.”

“What... are you talking about? What village?”

“Mayohiga! The place we’re getting started. Come on; I’ll show you.”

Chen grabbed my arm and tried to pull me along. I resisted, hanging back.

“No, wait,” I said. “I’m not part of this. I’m looking for the home of one of the Forest’s residents. They’re expecting me.”

“I’m not sure which mage’s house you want to find,” said Chen. “I don’t know all of them, and I don’t know most of their names. But look – you need a place for tonight, right? Mayohiga isn’t far from here. No matter if you choose to stay or not, I’ll help find your way in the morning. Does that sound good?”

I stood for a moment, regarding her as she tugged at my arm. With or without Chen’s help, finding Marisa’s place in the freezing dark sounded like an exhausting chore. I’ve lived with youkai my whole life, so I have a better sense for their motives and moods than most humans do. Chen gave me no feeling of hostility or deception. Instead she seemed eager for my company, as if she were trying to make a friend.

I would probably be safe at her accommodations for one night.

“All right. Lead the way.”

---

Chen skipped along, her tails whipping in the air behind her. She made sport of the woods around us. If we passed near a bush, she went out of her way to jump over it. If a tree branch was low enough, she leaped up to grab it with both hands, swinging herself forward like an acrobat. She led me to a wide gully, a natural trench with sharp slopes. I spent a few minutes lowering myself down one side and scaling up the other, grabbing at roots, hoping the ground didn’t disintegrate under me. Chen simply hopped over, then sat like a perching cat on a tree stump while waiting for me.

We pushed on. Before long, Chen’s footfalls took on a rhythm. She started humming in time with her steps. Humming grew into words, and she sang a poem as she guided me through the trees.

We seek the love that lasts forever.
We seek the passion that goes on and on.
We may not know it, but we’ve craved it so long.

Trying ourselves for worse and better.
Guessing the tune so we can sing along.
Mimicking in vain those who show us they’re strong.

Imagine, if you can, a life forever
Spent with your dearest of friends.
Does that wait for us, when this painful
Night of sour heartbreak finally ends?

Loved, your song may be. Sing it and see
That this song is not your own.
All good things you have
Are shared, not yours alone.

My daily life brings me such despair.
Anger, fear and pain are all I can see.
People don’t know what kind of monsters they can be.

I plead with my heart to forgive them,
And more so myself, so I can live in peace.
Let go my grudges and give them the love we need.

Some days, it seems so hard, doing to others
As you’d have them to unto you.
This trial strengthens us to love each other
No matter all the awful things we do.

For a day comes soon, a day when you
Will learn what you’ve been living for.
Then, if you let go,
Such hurts matter no more.

On the chance that Chen was truly leading me to a warm bed, I remained silent during her song.

I was about to complain about how far were traveling, but that’s when Chen stopped. She held up a hand. I stood still.

“Here,” she said. “Take my hand so the traps don’t get you.”

I looked up and around, scanning for trip wires or a conspicuous pile of leaves that might cover a pit. I couldn’t see anything but a thicket of tangled trees and bushes ahead of us, like a wall of foliage that nature itself had built to forbid entry.

“There’s nothing here,” I said.

“No, this is it. Me and my Ran hid the place pretty good. If you come here on purpose without being invited, that’s what the traps are for. Come on.”

She grabbed my hand and pulled me forward. She cut left into the thicket, and found a gap in the underbrush I hadn’t seen before now.

“Don’t let go,” said Chen, grasping my hand. “Touching me means the spells will ignore you. If you end up staying, I can change them so they don’t fire on you. My Ran showed me how.”

Above us and on either side, branches and bushes wound together so tightly that they formed a short tunnel. Its ceiling was too low for me to walk upright, so I had to hunch over. Chen’s ears didn’t quite graze the top.

This is when my spell light came close enough to see some element of the traps Chen mentioned. We passed by some sharpened staves of bamboo, mostly hidden in the foliage, only their tips poking into the passageway. Some mechanism must be buried deeper in the brush, ready to thrust the bamboo spears forward and impale unwelcome guests.

“What is this?” I said as we passed the spear tips. “Who would build siege traps in the middle of the woods?”

“My Ran built all this,” said Chen. “She’s amazing. If you end up living here, you’ll get to meet her sometime. These poky sticks aren’t even the first things she set up. She hid some others really well, further back.”

“But why? Do you really have people trying to come here uninvited?”

“Not yet! The traps have caught me dinner some nights: rabbit here, bird there. But there’s a soft ward too, lets any youkai know there’s danger. That keeps any nasty beasts away, and lets the Forest mages know – don’t go tressing this pass.”

“And who is this Mairan you keep mentioning? Your master?”

“She’s my Ran, not yours. I bet you don’t even have a Ran.”

As this conversation ended, Chen exited the tunnel, and so did I a second later. I stood upright and looked around. My spell light showed us in an artificial clearing, about the size of the Scarlet Mansion’s courtyard. The ground had been cleaned of rocks, roots and other debris, so that we stood on a patch of forest floor topped only with thin grass and a dusting of snow. Except for the tunnel we had just walked through, the clearing was fenced-in with a scaffold-style bamboo weave that stood at twice my height. Some branches and vines had tangled themselves into the fencing, implying this construction had been here since before the snows began.

I craned my neck back and looked up. It seemed like the forest canopy wasn’t as thick here, but I couldn’t be sure. My spell light didn’t reach up to the treetops. Only a black dome hung overhead.

Chen let go of my hand, and I didn’t get impaled with any bamboo spears. She skipped across the clearing, headed to a dark structure at the far end, beyond the reach of my light.

“At first, my Ran didn’t want me to try and start a village in the forest, but I thought this was a good place. Lots of youkai live here already. My Ran said—” Chen changed her voice, spoke in a deep and gruff impersonation of someone. “Well, if you’re gonna live in a clearing in the woods, we must make it a nice place!”

“So is your Ran some kind of... youkai engineer?”

“She can do anything. She’s big and strong and really, really old.”

I knew of a few youkai who were both strong and old. If my mistress and her librarian set their minds to it, they could make a place like this, complete with magical security systems. It unsettled me to think that this Ran person might equal Remilia Scarlet’s power or knowledge. There are many unknown things lurking in Gensokyo.

“Anyway, here’s my place,” said Chen, now that we had reached the far edge of the clearing. “It’s not much.”

---

Having crossed the space, I could see now that Chen’s abode was the only structure within it. Up against the fencing stood a raised wooden platform, which I could easily step up to. Upon this platform stood a strange compromise between an outdoor pet house and a human home. It was too small for anyone to live in, except maybe a single youkai girl who wanted a sheltered place to sleep. It had an angled roof, hanging eaves, and a door made from thatched straw. There was one circular window, barely large enough for anyone to look out from.

“It was a big deal for me, moving here.” Chen climbed up onto the platform, then pushed the thatched door open. “My Ran was proud of me for getting out of the house. Good way for me to grow up, she said.”

I followed her up onto the platform, then knelt on one knee and looked inside the... hut? Mini-cabin?

The insides were mostly bare, again reminding me of a pet’s house in the family yard. There was a bedroll and a few sacks off to one side – probably where Chen slept. The other side of the room was empty, just long enough for me to lie down. I could spread my cloak on the floor, then roll up my coat for a pillow, and rely on a spellcard to keep me warm. It wouldn’t be the best night’s sleep, but it seemed far better than trying to sleep outside again.

I glanced at Chen.

“Can I trust you enough to sleep here?”

Chen rolled her shoulders, still holding the door open.

“I have to trust you too. I’ve never seen anyone disappear and pop back up like you do. ‘sides, my Ran says I need to be nice if I’m gonna convince any youkai to live here. Get more fairies with a spoonful of sugar.”

“Do you think I’m a youkai? Because I’m a human.”

Chen tilted her head at me. She let out a low grrmmp noise, like a troubled cat. I had confused her.

“Couldn’t you tell?” I said.

“You’re not... oh!” Her face showed sudden understanding. “I get it. Most people can’t tell because they don’t have the smell power.” Chen tapped her nose with her free hand. “You don’t smell like a human, not even close, but don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me.”

I stared at her, thinking. It wasn’t the craziest thing to assume I was youkai, just to look at me. My hair is white and my eyes are blue, colors which I had never seen on another human in Gensokyo. I’ve never met a human woman my height or taller. Only some of the bigger men in Jinri stand at eye-level with me. I had grown up around youkai, so I shared some of their words and mannerisms. Combine all that with my shift and knife-throwing skills, and I could forgive someone for mistaking me as a youkai myself.

But Chen said I didn’t smell human? What did that even mean?

“All right,” I said. “To be fair, I already have a home and I don’t plan on living here long-term. Even knowing that, you’ll let me sleep here tonight and promise help me find my party in the morning?”

Chen nodded. “I hope you’ll change your mind, but yeah. Come on in.”

---

I crawled in after Chen. I would have to stay sitting or on my hands and knees while in here.

The thatched door fell shut behind us. I spread my belongings out on the empty side of the room. Chen nibbled on some dried meat while sitting on her bedroll. I ate one of my own travel cakes and chased it with the last of the water in my flask. I would need to get more tomorrow.

I killed my spell light, but kept my warmth spell active. I lay down, letting both my mind and body rest. It wasn’t long before I could hear Chen’s shallow purr across the hut. She sounded everything like a sleeping cat.

Without realizing it, I also wandered toward sleep – but not before a question arose from the basement of my mind.

Why do I look so different from the other humans in Gensokyo?